I'm exhausted, so I'm sorry if this winds up making no sense.
So, it turns out that both of my boys are smitten with Vivian. It's as if their big brother and protector role was instinctively activated when she was born.
Gavin spends every moment he can find giving her kisses and speaking to her animatedly in gibberish. Silas does everything he can to help with both of his siblings.
This morning was my first time driving since her birth. It was my first preschool drop off with all three of them. Silas was very impressed when I "put him in charge" of holding Gavin's hand as we walked through the building to Silas' classroom.
Viv is somewhere between Silas and Gavin as newborns in the sleep department. Some nights we are up for 2-3 hours in the middle of the night. Other nights she wakes up only long enough to eat, burp, and have her diaper changed.
Even on the nights when she won't sleep, she is sweet about it. It isn't 2-3 hours of blood-curdling screaming like with Silas. Just some whimpering over the gas in her belly that we are trying to work out. Just wanting to be snuggled up against mom or dad's chest.
Her demeanor remains calm, sweet, and patient. She is easy to adore.
The stairs are magically not as horrendous a feat as they were while I was 6-9 months pregnant. So, making 50 trips a day up and down them is not as bad as I thought it would be.
I still haven't tackled target by myself with all three of them, but I have successfully tackled it with just the two little ones, so I think I can handle throwing in Silas walking next to the cart asking me to buy him all of the things. I think.
So far I don't feel like I'm screwing it up with the boys. Neither of them is acting out in a way that makes me believe they feel left out. Hopefully that remains true as time progresses.
Basically, what I'm saying is that right now, we seem to be a stronger little family than ever.
I'm off to debate on a nap or cleaning house now while the little ones are sleeping.
Thursday, February 20, 2014
Monday, February 10, 2014
Welcome Vivian
Thursday morning I lay in bed waiting for noise to come from the boys' bedroom. I had decided to let them sleep in and start the day when they felt like it.
Once they got up, I got them dressed and we headed out to the car. My plan was to drop Silas off at school and go do last minute pre-baby errands.
It was snowing but the news the day before had assured viewers that the snow should not cause any trouble on the roads. It took me about half a mile to determine that the news had lied.
I settled for a quick trip to Target and hanging out with the boys in our loft until Michael's mom came to pick them up for the weekend.
After that I began to clean and wander into Vivian's room to look at her tiny pink things and cry and have anxiety.
The snow prompted the decision to rent a room in Dallas in order to avoid treacherous roads at 4 am. A sleepover with Jimmy, me, my mom and my aunt.
But first, Jimmy and I decided to have a pre-baby celebration meal. We went on a little dinner date. It is one of the happiest meals I have ever had. The food was good, and I sincerely enjoyed having a celebratory meal with my favorite person.
I didn't sleep well that night. I was nervous, and someone in that room was snoring loudly...
I woke up anxious and emotional. I cried a lot, and Jimmy constantly hugged me and kissed the top of my head and reassured me.
My mom had come to the hospital early to hold my hand during my epidural because Jimmy wanted no part of it. And then we found out they were inserting the epidural in the OR. My mom was not allowed to go with me. So, it was Jimmy or no one.
He reluctantly agreed and sat on a stool in front of me. We put our foreheads together and held hands.
I didn't jump, and it was over. I looked at Jimmy and smiled and noticed he was white as a sheet. "You ok?" He nodded in a way that made me know he was lying. "Are you sure?" He looked like he was about to faint, and looked at the nurse and said, "I need water."
He was led from the room, and they went about prepping me for surgery. All too soon, I got the same
weird feeling I had gotten with Gavin. "Seriously?!" I piped up, and the anesthesiologist asked me a
couple of questions. I was waiting to hear "we hit an artery. We're going to have to do the epidural again." I wanted to scream. Instead, I heard, "ok, I can give you something for that." And he did, and I felt normal again shortly. All that was left to worry about was whether or not Jimmy would be back for the birth.
After not much longer, in walked my handsome fiancé in his scrubs looking much better than the last time I had seen him. He sat down next to my head, and grabbed my hands and kissed my forehead with tears in his eyes, "we're about to have our little girl!"
My doctor began surgery, and Jimmy and I grinned at each other and sang the songs that came on in the background and chatted nervously and said "I love you" 900 times. Suddenly, in the middle of us chattering, we both stopped short and cried simultaneously when we heard "waaaaaah!
Vivian was born! Jimmy went over to take pictures and came back to show them to me.
When they announced that Viv was 8lbs, 1 oz, I was really surprised.
After a bit, Jimmy brought her over, and I got to see her beautiful, chubby little face and kiss on her loooooong fingers. "She's perfect, see?!" Jimmy unwrapped her to show me her ten toes, and we spent the next hour staring at her and kissing her while they finished up tying my tubes. When it was over, my doctor told me that my decision not to have more kids was a good one. My body couldn't handle carrying another one.
After a couple hours in recovery, we were taken to our room, and Candice brought up the boys. Silas was very concerned about me being in the hospital and he was smitten with Vivian. Gavin didn't care much about Vivian until Candice picked her up, then he tried to pull her blanket out of Candice's hands. Uh oh....
I spent the rest of the weekend adjusting to being back on a newborn's schedule and having a girl.
Can I just say (and I hope I'm not jinxing myself) that she is so sweet and so easy going. The only thing that I have seen make her angry is being cold (she is her father's daughter). Even when she's hungry, she announces it quietly. She is so much different than my boys who roared into the world at full force and never slowed down.
Now Jimmy, Vivian and I are at home. She loves her swing (Gavin taught me that a good swing is worth the investment). The boys come home this evening, and we'll see how it goes.
I know we'll all get adjusted.
I have to say that it is a very neat feeling to know that my family is complete. This is it, and it so perfect.
Once they got up, I got them dressed and we headed out to the car. My plan was to drop Silas off at school and go do last minute pre-baby errands.
It was snowing but the news the day before had assured viewers that the snow should not cause any trouble on the roads. It took me about half a mile to determine that the news had lied.
I settled for a quick trip to Target and hanging out with the boys in our loft until Michael's mom came to pick them up for the weekend.
After that I began to clean and wander into Vivian's room to look at her tiny pink things and cry and have anxiety.
The snow prompted the decision to rent a room in Dallas in order to avoid treacherous roads at 4 am. A sleepover with Jimmy, me, my mom and my aunt.
But first, Jimmy and I decided to have a pre-baby celebration meal. We went on a little dinner date. It is one of the happiest meals I have ever had. The food was good, and I sincerely enjoyed having a celebratory meal with my favorite person.
I didn't sleep well that night. I was nervous, and someone in that room was snoring loudly...
I woke up anxious and emotional. I cried a lot, and Jimmy constantly hugged me and kissed the top of my head and reassured me.
My mom had come to the hospital early to hold my hand during my epidural because Jimmy wanted no part of it. And then we found out they were inserting the epidural in the OR. My mom was not allowed to go with me. So, it was Jimmy or no one.
He reluctantly agreed and sat on a stool in front of me. We put our foreheads together and held hands.
I didn't jump, and it was over. I looked at Jimmy and smiled and noticed he was white as a sheet. "You ok?" He nodded in a way that made me know he was lying. "Are you sure?" He looked like he was about to faint, and looked at the nurse and said, "I need water."
He was led from the room, and they went about prepping me for surgery. All too soon, I got the same
weird feeling I had gotten with Gavin. "Seriously?!" I piped up, and the anesthesiologist asked me a
couple of questions. I was waiting to hear "we hit an artery. We're going to have to do the epidural again." I wanted to scream. Instead, I heard, "ok, I can give you something for that." And he did, and I felt normal again shortly. All that was left to worry about was whether or not Jimmy would be back for the birth.
After not much longer, in walked my handsome fiancé in his scrubs looking much better than the last time I had seen him. He sat down next to my head, and grabbed my hands and kissed my forehead with tears in his eyes, "we're about to have our little girl!"
My doctor began surgery, and Jimmy and I grinned at each other and sang the songs that came on in the background and chatted nervously and said "I love you" 900 times. Suddenly, in the middle of us chattering, we both stopped short and cried simultaneously when we heard "waaaaaah!
Vivian was born! Jimmy went over to take pictures and came back to show them to me.
When they announced that Viv was 8lbs, 1 oz, I was really surprised.
After a bit, Jimmy brought her over, and I got to see her beautiful, chubby little face and kiss on her loooooong fingers. "She's perfect, see?!" Jimmy unwrapped her to show me her ten toes, and we spent the next hour staring at her and kissing her while they finished up tying my tubes. When it was over, my doctor told me that my decision not to have more kids was a good one. My body couldn't handle carrying another one.
After a couple hours in recovery, we were taken to our room, and Candice brought up the boys. Silas was very concerned about me being in the hospital and he was smitten with Vivian. Gavin didn't care much about Vivian until Candice picked her up, then he tried to pull her blanket out of Candice's hands. Uh oh....
I spent the rest of the weekend adjusting to being back on a newborn's schedule and having a girl.
Can I just say (and I hope I'm not jinxing myself) that she is so sweet and so easy going. The only thing that I have seen make her angry is being cold (she is her father's daughter). Even when she's hungry, she announces it quietly. She is so much different than my boys who roared into the world at full force and never slowed down.
Now Jimmy, Vivian and I are at home. She loves her swing (Gavin taught me that a good swing is worth the investment). The boys come home this evening, and we'll see how it goes.
I know we'll all get adjusted.
I have to say that it is a very neat feeling to know that my family is complete. This is it, and it so perfect.
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