The top ten things I say daily

Here are the top ten things I say daily as a mom.  I imagine they will look quite familiar to you if you are a parent.

10. Don't touch that! (wherein "that" is usually some disease-ridden thing you are desperate to pick up off the ground)

09. Put that down!(wherein "that" is some sharp object just waiting for an opportunity to stab you or me but something you should absolutely not have in your tiny hand)

08. Get that out of your mouth! (wherein "that" is the thing I didn't want you to touch in the first place, but you ignored me, and now you've either got a choking hazard or cooties in your mouth)

07. Please sit still! (because I really need to get you dressed or put your shoes on or clip your nails or change your diaper)

06. Stop running in the house! (because you're going to bust your head open, and we're both going to cry, and I'm going to spend my night in the ER and give them even more of my hard-earned money because you want to run full-out through the house and slip on that truck I keep telling you to pick up and land squarely on the corner of the coffee table)

05. Can you take one more bite for mommy? (because you only want to eat Goldfish and Teddy Grahams and cheese....that's it.  Those are the things you'll willingly eat.  Everything else is a dual at ten paces)

04. Let's go! (because you are the most easily distracted person on earth.  It's "bye bye! bye bye!" all the time until we needed to be in the car twenty minutes ago at which point the guy across the street cutting the grass is the most fascinating thing you've ever seen, and now I have  you, my purse, your bag,  a sippy cup and my keys in my hands...even though you're fully mobile now, and I don't have four arms)

03. What do you want?! (because although you know an astounding amount of words, you prefer to whine or scream or repeat one word over and over at increasing decibels when you want something.  "Blanket!  Blan-KET! BLAAAAAAAANKET!  But you have two blankets in your hands, and I have no idea what it is you're getting at!  What do you want?!)

02.  What's that smell? (it's you.  You pooped, and it was a terrible time for you to do so.  I just changed your diaper or we're in the car 30 minutes from our destination or in public and you're totally terrified of those changing tables or you should have been asleep two hours ago, but you have been throwing all your bedding and your sippy out onto the floor every ten minutes and now I'm ignoring you and so you present the piece de resistance.  Poop.  "Change it.  You have to get me out of bed and change it.  Now.  I win.  You lose.  As usual.")

01. I love you (because you're awesome and really amazing in all your mischievous, adorable, patience-testing, perfection and I have no idea what exactly the point was to my life before there was you.)